Nah-Nah-Nah-Boo-Boo

I need structure, boundaries, a PLAN! UNFORTUNATELY for my SANITY, but FORTUNATELY for my PERSONAL GROWTH starting a business, getting it off the ground does not lend itself to predictability. At least not for me...thus far.

I am a planner! Based on the information I have, I make decisions that hopefully yield predictable outcomes. I think in equations. A + B = C, right? Wrong. That's not necessarily the case while starting a business (for the first time or at all.) You may prepare, plan, and promote, but that doesn't guarantee success. And it definitely doesn't guarantee success in any particular amount of time. Again, semi-detrimental to my mental health, but incredible for my personal growth.

Launching my non-profit has focrced me to play in an arena totally unfamiliar to me, to use skills I haven't spent a lot of time developing and parts of my brain I didn't know I had. Submitting to this process has not been easy, but it has been fruitful. I had a hunch, but I now know for certain-I'm not a quitter! This is tough. One of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but I'm determined to make it work. I've also discovered that I can have peace even though I don't have control. You may have already guessed that I'm a control freak, hence the referrences to predictability and equations. Living in the abyss of uncertainty isn't easy for people like me, but thanks to prayer and great mentors, I'm surviving. Perhaps my most notable discovery-fear is just a bully! It has taunted me for years, threatening certain failure if I dared reach for my dreams. Warning me of personal collapse if I crossed the threshold of known to unknown. But Nah-nah-nah-boo-boo, I did it! I'm living by faith! The God who commissioned me has and will continue to provide for me. Whether that be great networking opportunities, food, gas money, or peace of mind-He will continue to give me everything I need. And I will continue this journey-through the definite and the obscure, the rough and the smooth, the triumphs and the failures-to a Life of Purpose!